We Call It Football

OK, I'm getting tired of the whole "we-call-it-Football", "its-not-Football-its-Handegg-proper-Football-is-played-with-the-feet" controversy.

Here's the dilly: Amongst ourselves, we call it "Football" and the foot game "Soccer." When we're around others from elsewhere we'll call our game "American Football" so you won't get it mixed up with what you call "Football." OK?

Fair enough.

I don't know why a game with more resemblance to Rugby was allowed to use the name "Football" without considerable ridicule but that's the name the inventors gave it. They should have called it "American Rugby" but they didn't.

"Soccer" and "Football" can be used to describe the same thing just as "toilet" and "shitter" can be used to describe the same thing in different regions. Here's another example: picture a sandwich that's on a 12'' long roll with meats and cheeses, lettuce, tomato, onions, oil and vinegar, oregano, salt and pepper. In New York City they call it a "Sub." in Philadelphia its a "Hoagie." Same sandwich, different regions, different names.

Conversely there can be two different things with the same name. I don't feel like thinking up any examples. Use your imagination.

Unlike most Americans I have no problem using the "Football / American Football" differentiation because it helps avoid confusion. Just don't give me that shit about American Football being a sissy game because its a goddamn dangerous game.

Ask any wide receiver how safe it is leaping into the air to make a catch, and before he regains control of his body some psychopath like Asante Samuels barrels into him with full force leading with his helmet and he falls to the ground like a broken limp dick with stars circling his head and church bells ringing in his ears.

Google "Joe Thiesman Broken Leg Video." and report back. I once watched while a player with a broken neck had to be given CPR on the field.

This is not to take anything away from Soccer (Football) where players are unprotected running up and down the field (pitch) and collide with full force where any number of injuries can occur. My wife's cousin is a fantastic Soccer (Football) player and has had several concussions.

I love the way Soccer (Football) players have to be forced to leave the game when there's blood pouring from their heads. That's tough. That's dedication. That's fucking sports (sport). It's the mark of a champion and I freakin' love it.

Both are great games, both have unique characteristics, both are equally dangerous to the players, complete with concussions and broken bones. We all have to concede that point.

Any American who claims that Soccer (Football) isn't a sport, or is a sissy game is an ignroant douchebag. It's a fantastic game, thrilling to watch and has plenty of injuries to satisfy one's blood lust. Just because you never played it or don't understand it doesn't mean that it sucks. If you don't like it, fine, but on behalf of 99% of the sports fans in the world, maybe you should broaden your horizons a little.

And occasionally in Football (American Football) the ball is kicked.

Football.

Go Giants.